Saturday, June 16, 2007

Finding myself at McDonalds


We were at McDonalds the other day to pick up a quick supper. The kids (well, kid) proclaimed "we want nuggets," so the order was two nugget happy meals, and one 2 cheeseburger meal, plain, diet cokes for all.

I proceeded to the 2nd window to pay for our meal of trans-fats, fried chicken parts, and South American beef product in a patty and then to the first window, where we were to recieve our instant gratification. The friendly 16 year old opened the window and handed me our drinks with a brace filled smile. Three drinks, one adult, one vehicle, as expected, no drink holder. That's ok though, we have a giant SUV with cup holders in the cargo area - we are still doing alright.

As we sat waiting for our heart attack in a bag meal, the big question came up. The same happy faced McEmployee opened the window again and asked "Would you like sauce with the nuggets?" Anyone with two kids in a car knows that's a trick question. I really like BBQ sauce, especially from McDonalds, and it makes my pleasure meal even that more pleasureable. But this time we'd be eating on the go and I knew if V saw my BBQ sauce, he'd decide his nuggets and fries just weren't complete without it. Now, we all like our kids to be happy but dark red BBQ sauce and the light grey Expedition leather seats just don't go really well together. I him-hawed for a few more seconds, when, before I could decline the friendly (and tempting) offer, I hear from the backseat in an all familiar voice...

"MOMMY, YOU NEED TO BE MORE ASSERTIVE."

A four-something-year-old is telling me I need to be more assertive. Now, realize I have been a police officer for longer than this kid's been alive (by a few years, even), and I think a pretty effective one at that. I think I am pretty assertive. So naturally, the next question, was "V, do you even know what that means?" He replies "You need to decide. Yes or No. I learned it on Spongebob."

I learned it on Spongebob. Great.

So it's true, Spongebob IS teaching life lessons. Plus, it's something that I can at least tolerate watching. It's better than Caliou and some of those other annoying Kum by Ya shows they have.

I just wanted to share that tidbit of a story with you. I thought it was hilarious, but I suppose it has a bit of "something to think about" quality to it too. If not, I guess it just means I was holding up the fast moving drive-thru lane at the Winfield McDonalds. I'm lovin' it.



2 comments:

Amy said...

That is AWESOME! I totally love it! He is one hilarious kid.

Caliou totally sucks. And stupid Dora and Diego make me want to have tantrums. I am NOT looking forward to the day when she figures out how to turn the TV on and change the channel on her own (but it'll be years before she can reach the breaker box, and Mommy isn't afraid to turn off the power to the TV).

Unknown said...

Yes. . .the twins learned to say,"I'm gonna kick your butt!" from Spongebob too- but that's not really a life lesson. Haha.